[johnsmith11]

hi i am just looking for some non bias advice... i am 21...i met a 28 yr old boy a year ago fell super in love, spent every day together and then 3 months ago decided we wanted to eventually get married, and decided we wanted to try and have a baby, we were in no rush but we went to the docotor and had tests done and i took folic acid to prevent spinal disorder... and thena month ago my bfs best friend died, they were really close he got really messed up, and i tryed to be there to suport him but our realtionship took a downward spiral i moved out go my own place and we were breaking up every day... i seem to make him really unhappy... 2 nights ago he broke up with me in the middle of the night and then forced me to stay over... then yesterday he tells me he loves me wants to be with me and doesnt ever want to be without me... and then i went out for dinner with my girlfriend and took a test because i was late and sure enough i preg.. now he dosnet want to have it we are "broken up" and i dont no what to do.... i dont want a baby... i cant raise a baby on my own i dont have money to do that... my parents cant help me... i want to go to school... but how can i kill it after i already was trying to get preg? i wouldent be able to live with myself..... i am freaking out.... i wanted to have a baby with a man i was inlove with and for my child to have everything every option from the day its born....... not what i can offer on my own... i dont no what to do...

[Alejandros Mommy]

Hello.

Just a few things about me that may help you. I was engaged when I got PG with my oldest at 18. Suffice to say the "dad" told me to get an abortion and left. I was 19 when I had my oldest. I lived at home and my parents did not "financially" help me. I worked my butt off during my pregnancy until I was told I could not work. Saved every penny to get what I needed. I also went back to work when my oldest was 3 months old, only when my parents could take care of him so I could make sure I had enough money for diapers etc. It was hard. I went back to school full time later and worked F/T with the support of my family. It is not easy. I wont make it out to be. It is extremely hard to go at it 'alone" BUT there are choices.

You don't have to keep the baby. You can get it adopted if you so choose to go that route or there is even the option of not having it at all. The choice is yours. I and no one can make this decision for you. Its not always easy. You don't have to do what everyone thinks is the right thing. Make this choice for you and you alone.

*hugs*

[ec6169]

Wow, i am really sorry to hear this. I am some what in the same vote as you, I am pregnant as well and we(meaning my bf) have been trying to figure out how this is going to work when the baby arrives. I actually started my own pregnancy blog, and all the information i have retained by experience and from all the google searches i have done (lol)....feel free to stop by or even comment, and this goes for everyone who views this comment
http://freshlyskilled.blogspot.com/ --i update it EVRDAY on relevent pregnancy information and things we all should know

[Kimmama]

There is a lot of help available out there for women in your position. You might consider private adoption (kind of like the movie "Juno"). There are tons of families out there who would give their right arm to adopt a newborn and experience the pregnancy with you (and likely pay for your expenses!)