[mlcassid]

Hello everyone! I'm more here to vent...
*sigh* I had a cornual ectopic pregnancy back in May where the baby was thriving and had a heartbeat but they had to terminate it because it was in the wrong part of my uterus and would have caused it to burst before too long. It took 2.5 months to recover physically from that and for things to start getting back to normal. On our second anniversary in October, we found out we were expecting again. But we ended up having a miscarriage 10 days later while we were visiting Florence, Italy (scary when nobody at the hospital speaks English and you are trying to explain that you could have another ectopic). That happened on October 24. My HcG levels were down to 5 on October 29th. Now, it is November 25 and still no period. This past week I had AF cramps on two days (the Monday before Thanksgiving and on Thanksgiving day.) Enough to make me wear a pad and run to the bathroom every time to check and see if AF was there. I took a test the day after Thanksgiving and BFN. I took one this morning (November 25) and another BFN. I'm assuming I will get my period this week sometime. But it's hard when your mind and body play tricks on you. I have had sore bbs all week long and a high CP. I've also found myself crying at the silliest things and my temps are up. I know deep down that it must be my body getting back to normal and that if I stay relaxed and distracted AF will come and we can try again. I JUST HATE THIS F-ING WAITING!! Does anyone else just feel like TTC is just one big waiting room day in and day out?! If we aren't waiting for AF, we are waiting to ovulate; waiting for implantation, waiting for temps, waiting for symptoms and then wait for testing, doctors, etc. Only to do it all over again. Meanwhile, everyone we know have come forward with happy tales of new pregnancy (which makes me happy for them and hopeful for me...but I feel so left out and left behind). I know it will happen one day for us too, but all this waiting and my impatience has me, well, impatient. Thanks for letting me vent!

[2girls]

I am sorry you are going through all of this.
My cycles are all messed up since my miscarriage. My doctor told me that is to be expected. So I think you'll just need to "wait" and give your body time to heal and get back to normal.
I know that isn't what you want to hear. I am on my third cycle and nothing has been normal since August.
Good luck with everything, and I hope your body can bounce back so you can get back in the game!

[poliscmjr]

I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you in Italy. I can't imagine going through that in another country.

You said it best that our lives have turned into a waiting room! I just wish things would change for us who are TTC. I hope AF shows up for you real soon so you can start trying again.

[quagmire8]

so sorry to hear all that you have been through. you have every right to vent and be upset. you are so right about the constant waiting room that is TTC. maybe you can try calling the doctor in a few days and he can give you something to induce AF. again, so sorry for all that you have been through, i hope you get a BFP really soon and you have a healthy 9months!

[trying4four]

I am so sorry to hear about what happened. I had 2 m/c's in a row and it took quite a while for my cycles to get back to normal. I do know what you mean about the waiting game, it drives me insane!

[mlcassid]

Ladies, thank you so much for your encouraging words! I think some days I just get so down and melancholy about the whole thing. I try and take it day by day. I've been considering taking singing lessons or something like that just to give me a hobby that isn't work-related and something to focus on and think about for the fun of it. Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans and sometimes I forget that life is passing me by as I wait. I can't lose sight of that.

[quagmire8]

i like the idea of singing lessons! i did something similar back in january, i bought a couple of dwarf hamsters to take care of! they are so cute and sweet!!