[katesbirdworld]

Has anyone had the problem of their adult kids stop talking to you after they become adults. I have a daughter 26 and a son 23 and when they became 18 they seemed to stop communication. I love them and my heart is breaking. Their dad was abusive and I was their protector. Some will say why did you stay. He threatened to leave with the kids if I didn't. If anyone can help me shed some light on this please help. I miss my kids.

[mcmama]

I had the issue of my ex trying to take the kids away via legal bullying. It really messes with the kids perception of your authority, since usually the abuser is telling the kids that he is doing the right thing for their own good. They grow up believing that abuse is a positive thing.

Now that you have your life renewed with a new husband and some interesting activities, it becomes easy for them to see what you endured - and they may not want to see that.

Keep in touch with them, and keep it positive, about their lives.

[katesbirdworld]

Oh, I do, I never show negative attitude towards them. I try to keep in touch but they say they are busy and do not want to be bothered. I never talk about the past, because the past is the past and I do not even want to think about it and honestly I do not hold a grudge towards their father. Thats a wasted emotion. Thanks for the advice.

Originally Posted by mcmama

I had the issue of my ex trying to take the kids away via legal bullying. It really messes with the kids perception of your authority, since usually the abuser is telling the kids that he is doing the right thing for their own good. They grow up believing that abuse is a positive thing.

Now that you have your life renewed with a new husband and some interesting activities, it becomes easy for them to see what you endured - and they may not want to see that.

Keep in touch with them, and keep it positive, about their lives.

[swt1899]

It may not have to do with their past. My family and I don't talk enough... I call when I can. Lives at 23-26 get busy... almost mach 2 speed. College, jobs, careers taking shape, etc. I'm 29 and around 24 it was like I jumped onto a speeding race car. Ugh! When I get home from work I am so tired that talking on the phone isn't exactly what I need to do. I have to get dinner going and laundry washed. It's insane. They love you and appreciate who you are.

Originally Posted by katesbirdworld

Has anyone had the problem of their adult kids stop talking to you after they become adults. I have a daughter 26 and a son 23 and when they became 18 they seemed to stop communication. I love them and my heart is breaking. Their dad was abusive and I was their protector. Some will say why did you stay. He threatened to leave with the kids if I didn't. If anyone can help me shed some light on this please help. I miss my kids.