[mom13and7]

Ok, this went really long. I just need to vent. I have been trying for a VERY VERY long time to "keep my head up", "have faith", "be patient", and "be strong". I also have been trying very hard to "if you don't like it change it" (the only advise my husband seems to have when I need to vent), so I thought I would vent here. My main challange is money, though after the last couple weeks; children (my two as well as the neighbor kids and my niece) are very much in the mix. Money, oh the horrid little life necessity. I watch tv and talk to people and it seems like everyone else's money troubles either are because they made bad life choices and continue to do, or that they really wish they could afford the little bit extra. I talk to people all the time that complain about money issues and then watch them go out to get a pack of smokes, a 12 of beer or see their kid walking down the street with a treat from the ice cream man. It seems like I am the only one that is worried about feeding my kids, keeping the roof over over our heads, electricity and water on, much less the months and months of waiting to conquer the "when it gets better we can take care of that" list. I, logically know that millions are in the boat with me, and that I tend towards being a drama queen when it comes to money issues and always head for worrying about having enough food, and it just seems like I am alone here. I also know if I had not had a few minutes of being a dishonest idiot than I would not be here and that that does not exactly make me better than others who are in their position because they did not get a college degree and/or are trying to escape a bad marriage, nor do I have the right to look down my fat nose at them because they have addicitons I do not have, and frankly have not been in a position of being pressured into trying. I am just finding it frustrating, I have a bachelor's degree, I have 7 solid years of nursing experience and 7 years of kinda off and on nursing experience. I am willing to work, I can't work this very moment as a RN, I let my license go inactive a few years ago and it would take about $150 I do not have to reactivate it. I just want a job that would allow me to work around my kid's and even more difficult, husband's, schedules. I have put in application after application with very little success. So far the only job I seem to be able to secure is for a temp agency as a banquet server. I think I got hired by them because they will hire anyone, So far they seem happy with me, but working 1-2 days a week, maybe, for a grand total of about 8-12 hours a week and about 6 days a month just isn't cutting it and they seem to schedule according to the Murphy's Law method, (which coincidentally is the Law governing my life). When I took the job, it seemed great, I just needed to keep things together for a few more months and then my hubby would get out of college (finally after 12 years (he will say 10 but it was closer to 12)), he was getting a bachelor's MIS degree; which is a information science degree with a focus of business, he has a good head for business (not for personal finance, he thinks checking accts magically grow money if you only write small checks for cash, ie it is ok to go to the grocery store write a $20 check to yourself 1-2 times a week and not tell your wife), he has military service and works in technical support for air force weather. I had convinced myself that as soon as he graduated someone would grab him up. Well here we are 6 months post grad, my husband says he is putting in dozens of apps a week but I do not see when he is doing that except at his current job and even then the only job and interview offers he has gotten are to sell insurance or invest in some francise. I have started looking again but seem to only get rejected or ignored by the places I would like to work and am having a hard time finding a night shift job or one that allows me to set my own schedule. I understand that it can be tough to find dependable people and that for "entry level" type jobs you need to be kinda strict but why do they have to make it so hard? For instance, early on I interviewed to be a cashier at a local grocery store. The interviewer made it sound like I had the job, if the store's manager could do the hours, the "normal" start and stop times were not that different than my requested hours. I never heard back, which means the manager did not want to work with me. I still do not understand why it was so all fallotting important about me leaving 1 hour early so that I could be home when my then 6 yr old and 12 yr old got home from school. They never even called back when I called to say I could work with them if it was a problem. Ok, I need to calm down and go to bed. It is 3 am.

[allybama]

ummm...generally speaking, places want you to work around their schedules. You work for them, not the other way around....is probably why you never heard back. BUT you could call and touch base with them, just in case. And for the sake of an hour, I'd be very inclined to let my 12 year old babysit my 6 year old for an hour (or send both to the neighbour's) to get a job that meant the difference between eating and starving. From the point of view of an employer, whose primary concern is his/her bottom line, leaving an hour early and having to reschedule other people's shifts so you can be home when your kids get home is probably something they would view as a frivolous reason. You're probably coming across to them as "too much trouble". Maybe try applying for jobs that have flexible hours if you really can't/won't leave them alone for one hour a day. Or work from home? Take in kids to babysit?

[AudreyOka]

So I'm debating what to say here. You mentioned your husband writing $20 checks twice a week...that's $40. That would buy the kids the treat you see other kids having. That would buy the smokes or beer you see others having. In fact 10 weeks of those small little checks would pay your fee to get your license back.

So what can you do? Here's my two cents. You need $150. Find a local MaryKay, Tupperware, Discovery Toy or Pampered Chef distributor. Take a catalog and go sell $500 worth of products. I don't care what it takes go sell it. You'll earn $150 and you can renew your license. Now with the license you can get a job which will bring in a steady income.

You have 100% control and power here. You can make the changes to change your life.

[allybama]

Precisely! Or take the other job, stay the last hour of the day until you earn the $150 to get your licence back.

[mcmama]

This is a good idea Audrey, I have known superselling Avon distributors who hired people to help sell this way too. This way they sell product, but they don't have to make the investments.

If you have office skills, elance is a good way to pick up a bit of extra money. It is office work you can do from home. A lot of it is taken by Indian and Chinese companies who charge less than we can afford to, but some people need short term assignments completed by people who can really speak English, and are located in the US or Canada.

Having been in the position of hiring people for part time work, I agree, "flexible" work means the employer's flexibility, not the employees. I had to interview dozens of people when I was at the music school for an admin job, with the stipulation that they were available to be on the school site Saturday morning from 9am to 2 pm, when our ensembles met. The other days could be flexible. Well, I got all sorts of impressive resumes with offers to "come into the office evenings" or "Saturdays ok after baseball season". I did not even bother to interview those. Some who got as far as the interview backed off when they realized that this was not just pure office work and bookkeeping, you had to be onsite to deal with management of the ensembles and the kids, parents, and facility we rented. We specified all this in our advertising, but people just saw the words "part time" "office" "music" "bookkeeping" and "flexible". Also in a retail setting, they need to be sure the schedules are covered, so they are less likely to hire someone who has to be home after school. People who apply with those restrictions really are a dime a dozen.

Nurses are very much in demand in many places - And I would think that this is a much more satisfying profession than anything that fills in the gaps just for money. I do know nurses who have school age children, and work around shifts - requires a good partnership in the marriage, and good organization. It can be very demanding, even on a per diem basis. But in the long run, I think personally, professionally, and financially you are better off pursuing this, and your family is too. Right now, all you have to worry about is the licensing fee. Don't let it go so long that your training is also out of date, because then it is so much more difficult to re enter the profession.

[amholb0]

You sound very frustrated. Have a hug! I hope it gets better and you can find the money to get you nursing license back. Would you be able to work as CNA (nurse tech), until you can get it back? My DH worked as one for a couple years and his hours were at night, also they had techs that worked on call, so they essentially made their own hours. I really do hope you can get your license back, we are in such need of nurses right now, maybe you could find an employer that would be willing to help you out with the cost, just so they can cover their shifts.

[QueenAngie]

Are you home schooling or will your children be back in school in the next few days?

It would seem reasonable that the 12 yo (unless very immature) could watch the 6 yo for an hour after school at home. Or go to the neighbors'.

There are nurses jobs available everywhere. Some are as short as 4 hours or 8 or 12 hours, as needed at just about any hospital. If you choose to work as a nurse, you need to get your license again as the above friends noted.

Now that DH has graduated, will he be getting a raise?

Another thought is to pack everyone's lunches and snacks for work and school. Send DH with a big cup of his fav coffee from home, so he doesn't have to stop at the coffee shop for it daily.

You could always be a in home babysitter. Am not certain on the licensing laws in your state. That way you'd be home w/ the kids when they were not in school.

I think your best bet is getting your license and working part-time at a clinic, hospital, home health, or any other place.

[peace2you]

It does seem that you are more focused on the problem than you are the solution. Does that make sense to you? Your post is full of all the reasons why you cannot accomplish this and you cannot accomplish that. May I suggest that you begin focusing your thoughts and energy towards finding a way, any way, (you've been given some excellent suggestions here) to get your nursing license renewal? You say in your post that you let it go inactive a few YEARS ago. That sounds much longer than you should have let it continue expired. So, you didn't get in this predicament overnight and you won't get out of it overnight. Pick a starting place and work from there. You are trying to process everything at once and it is overwhelming you. Just start somewhere and go from there. This time next year, you will be in a much better place financially. It also sounds like your husband needs some money managment counseling. God bless and I hope everything gets settled down for you and your family as you begin to take proactive steps to fix this.