[adoptionblessings]

Dear Birth Parents, I am an adoptee who was born in 1955 during the closed adoption era. I was reunited with my birth sisters over 10 years ago after a lengthy search. My birth parents were deceased when I found my 3 sisters. I did receive some non-identifying information from the agency I was adopted through. And my birth sisters gave me quite a few lovely photos of my birth parents who were married to each other at the time of my birth and adoption. I am grateful for these! But what I found sad about my adoption reunion is that I never had something tangible that was meant to be given to me from my birth mother or father - nothing that spoke to me as an adoptee of my story, their thoughts of me or their dreams for me. And since they passed away, I could never see them face to face to have that connection. I cannot say how valuable letters/journals/ and pictures/small gifts can be! Even if the adoptee is young now and you are not in an open adoption, do write down your thoughts/feelings/prayers and/or dreams for your child. And if you can set aside a small gift/tangible item- a piece of jewelry, a special token, something personal for them. I would give anything to have something from my birth parents! Though the photos I was given from my birth sisters are priceless and I am fortunate to have them, I deeply miss some kind of personal connection from my birth parents to me. I know some birth parents reunite with the children they placed for adoption- and some find closed doors due to fears and misunderstandings, or other persons dictating what the adoptee should or should not do. But someday the adoptee may seek them out or desire to connect. These letters can be placed with the agency or kept in a keepsake box or album for the adoptee. A suggestion to write thoughts to your child and reflections on their birthdays
From an adoptee who wishes she had one or more of these precious things to cherish from my birth parents.