[mcmama]

My sons have attended several private schools over the years. The first school they attended was very specific in its dress code - length of skirts, types of shoes and heels for girls, types of shirts and pants for boys - and jacket and tie were required for boys from 4th grade and up. I found this easy enough to accomodate for the boys, as there were good clothing deals through Lands End, and they received hand me downs in good condition. I liked that it taught them to get dressed to get down to the business of school. Mothers of girls found it more difficult, since so much in the stores was really inappropriate - at one point it was almost impossible to find something that did not bare the midriff unless it was really button down preppy dressy.

In seventh grade, they aged out of this school and went to another private school with a much looser attitude and dress code. It was an adjustment. The dress code at the current school allows jeans, sneakers, sweats, etc, no one wears jackets and ties. Just the clothing cannot be ripped, and questionable slogans cannot be on the t shirts. However I have seen questionable "double meaning" sexually suggestive slogans on some intramural team shirts, and no one says boo. My son wears a wool fedora most days (think Bear Bryant, Frank Sinatra), and a few teachers have made him take it off in class, which I support. On the days he wears a doo rag, no one seems to mind.

There are a lot of reasons my kids don't attend the local public school, dress is not one of them. The public school has made rules from time to time about wearing baseball hats backwards, doo rags, t shirt slogans. At one point students were discouraged from wearing leather jackets - because other students would try to steal them or cut them up. I think they struggled with rules about how low your baggy pants can hang down. In the 80s there were rules about tying your shoes and wearing your clothing backwards. One of our neighboring districts has banned gang colors on all clothing. I doubt you can really enforce that.

Dress with adolescents is a pretty fluid thing - styles change. Seems like if you get too specific about what's not allowed in a more relaxed atmosphere, someone finds a way around it.

Does your school have a dress code that works (not uniforms, dress code)? What are the challenges? Should faculty and administration be able to make decisions about attire on a case by case basis?