[indiff3rnt]

Okay, I am not sure how to behave in this situation and would LOVE some advice:
My ex-husband recently got married and now has new step-kids. My son (and his) spends time with them and they get along okay, no major problems. The problem is that I feel like they are forcing me to establish some kind of relationship with them. The kids want to do things with me and the youngest wants to spend time at my house with my son.

The thing is that I really don't have alot of patience to deal with kids so my own is pretty much all I like to interact with for more than an hour at a time. I love my son and could spend all day just hanging out with him. But other people's kids just annoy me most of the time (hopefully no one will judge me for admitting that). So now I am constantly having to come up with reasons why they can't come over, etc. I don't want to hurt their feelings or make them think I don't want to be friends with them because of any feelings concerning my ex. I really have none at all, except that I wish he'd move far away. Really, I think it might be my ex pushing them on me, but I'm not sure. And I'm not sure how to even approach the subject.
Has or does anyone have a similar situation? Thanks!

[BonusMom]

How recently did they get married?

Do these kids have stepsiblings? How do they get along with them and thier siblings parents?

I think its natural for kids to just assume family is family. and if your son is thier brother then you are close family too.

I had a Step Sister that came to stay with us on the weekends. She lived at least two hours away and we had to meet halfway. She talked about me a lot to her mom and she always wanted me to spend the night. We were the same age and into the same stuff. One weekend I did stay over there and her mom was very nice to me. Although I didnt see her much because we were teenagers by then and wanted to do our own thing the whole night.

How old is your son and his Ssiblings?

[hennypenny]

I think the best bet is to be honest with your ex, tell him it's a responsibility that you do not want nor need in your life, and that these types of visits won't be taking place. But that you are very happy they seem to all get along so well.

[ttina]

Age here may make a big difference. Do you allow your son's friends to come over? Granted you are not a kid person... Don't worry not everybody is. But what you need to take into account is you are denying your son a friendship. My son has brought friends home all his life. He wants to share his home with his friends. Your son is wanting to share his "other" life with a friend, who happens to be a stepbrother. This is where the age factors in. If the boys are 6 there is going to have to be more involvment from you than if they are 12. My son and his friends essentially use me for food and transportation. Other than that when they're here I can't pry them from son's room. If you feel the boys are bringing your ex into your life too much, speak to the ex... say, I am glad that Matt and Steve are friends, I will not stand in the way, but don't expect me to be comfortable being buddy buddy with you and your wife. Chances are the friendship will phase and they won't need to be around each other as much. Then there is the option of allowing your son go over to the stepbrother's house to "play".
Whether you are a kid person or not, your son will bring them into your life. Don't begrudge this friendship just because of this other boy's ties to your ex's new life.