[GrandmaofKasey]

I have a son who is going through a custody/visitation/divorce proceeding and want to know how I can best help him. He lives 22 hours away and is an only child with 2 stepbrothers on my side. His soon to be ex-wife has been emotionally abusing the child by telling her negative or untrue things about what is going on. It seems like she is trying to separate this very loving child from her father and our family. Recently the child has said to her father "I wish I never had a father" it has made him very sad. Not sure where to go, we have had an attorney since April 2007 and there still has not been much progress made except temporary joint custody. What can we do to stop the mother from negatively impacting this child's life. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. They live in NY and I in Kansas.

[mcmama]

This is very rough on you I am sure. The worry must be terrible.

You cannot stop the childs mother from doing what she will do. All you can do is document, document, document, and give your son the support he needs to navigate the legal system.

Sometimes children actually stir the pot, in an attenpt to gain control. Sometimes the negative emotions they are feeling about having things so unsettled spill out.

Has a guardian ad litem been appointed? And is your grandaughter receiving any counseling or therapy?

[QueenAngie]

Welcome to the board!

So sorry that your darling granddaughter is going through this.

Not only is it difficult on the two adults getting a divorce, but the children get caught in the middle.

As Mcmama noted, be certain to document in a journal all the daily events with your son, his soon-to-be ex-wife, and the granddaughter.

Wishing you all the best.