[lolo]

Hello everyone,
I am new to this site and a new grandmother. I would love to chat with grandmothers around the country. Is anyone interested in sharing experiences and life with grandchildren? I am truly the happiest I have ever been since giving birth to my own children 22, 27 and 29 years ago - only this time I am actually giddy. Please write.
Lolo

[Maria]

HI O,
I am 58, from New York and would love to share the joy of the experiences of being a grandmother. I have 3 grown sons and 3 grandbabies. Would like to hear from you if you are interested. Maria

[lolo]

Hello Maria,
Thanks for responding. Since I live in San Diego it would be great to get the east coast perpective on grandparenting. Hopefully, we can get a cross section of the country to join in.

I am 55 have one son age 29, unmarried living in northern California and two daughters ages 22 and 27. My 22 year old has a serious boyfriend and my 27 year old is married and has given me my first granddaughter - 6 weeks old. Beginning Monday I will become the babysitter since my daughter will be returning to work. Part of me can't believe I have done this to myself, but a bigger part of me couldn't let a stranger take care of her. We have set vacations and boundaries set up. so I think all will go okay.I was an at-home mom during my children's growing up years, returning to school when my youngest went to kindergarten. I "retired" from a career in interior design when we took over the care of my ailing, elderly in-laws. We brought them out here from Connecticut. They both have passed on, but I never returned to work. My older sister lives about an hour away, has three grandchildren, but works parttime as an RN and only occasionally babysits. I think we all recognize the dilemas facing raising children today and to me the extended family needs to be there just as it was many years ago. How old are your grandchildren? Are they children of one or more of your children? Do they live near by? How involved are you in their lives? Is there another set of grandparents involved? These and other things are what we can talk about. How do you feel about the society our grandchildren are growing up in? What do you feel is our role? I am looking forward to postings and e-mails.
Lolo (my real name is Ora. I'll explain Lolo later)

[Maria]

Hi Ora,
Nice to meet you. I am looking forward to chatting with you. Congratulations on becoming a grandmother. I have 3 grandchildren, a grandson who was 2 in May from my middle son, who is 30 and married, a granddaughter who was 2 in July from my oldest son who is 34 and married and they just had a baby boy June 28, which makes him about a week older then your grandchild. They both own homes near me so we see them very often. My youngest son, 25, is single, but does have a girlfriend and still lives at home. I stopped working 2 yrs. ago to help babysit when my daughter-in-laws went back to work. We had to make a scheduale because my grandchildren being 2 mths. apart I couldn't watch them at the sametime. Luckly, there mothers and I were able to work things out.
I also never went back to work as a dental assistant and now have my 88 yr. old mom living with us that needs care. So I am kept pretty busy, my daughter-in-law is extending her maternity leave for a few mths. to be home with her 2 children for awhile and is trying to change her shift so when she goes back to work my son will be coming home and be there for the children.
Well its getting late, will chat more next time, hope to hear from you again, feel free to e-mail me at....... mythreesons612@aol.com, Maria

[lolo]

Maria,
What a wonderful introduction. We have quite a lot in common. I am looking forward to many chats as our grandchildren grow. Hopefully other grandmothers will join in our "club" so we can get a wide variety of ideas to share. My daughter wanted to spend more time home, but she is a loan officer for a developer and one of her projects is being sold and she had to get back to "capture" loans. Her husband works for a grocery store and works odd hours so I am not sure what the schedule will be like. Today she has to meet with clients and he is working so I will have the baby most of today. My son-in-law's parents are divorced and live in the state of Washington. His grandparents and uncles and cousins live locally. They visit sporadically.Our family is more involved in their lives on a daily basis. His mother is coming to stay a week. I like her very much but it might be a bit tense while she is here. It will be her first visit with the baby. It is sad (but happy for me) that he prefers our extended close knit family. I don't want the grandchildren to feel any tension so I will be working hard to ease things. How do you work things out in that regard?
Anyone North, East, South, West want to join in?
Ora (Lolo)

[lolo]

It has been an interesting week. My daughter, Katie, has started back to work and I am now officially babysitting. The baby, Kylie, of course is not sleeping through the night being only 7 weeks old so the new routine is exhausting for her and her husband, Nathan. He works very odd hours and they have tiffs about the nighttime feedings. He is coming home from work in the afternoons tired. My daughter asked me to keep the baby the full day. I will give him a reprieve because the baby is at an awkward, trying stage. Nathan's mother is coming Thurs for a week from Washington and he will have vacation time to spend with her and her family. We will re-set a schedule when she leaves. They both need to learn to give up their freedom, but I am willing to get them through the first few weeks of adjusting to the new work schedule. I have always thought it stupid for women in their 40's and now 50's to have babies, but the one gift we oldsters have is patience. More to come soon. Let me know how life is with you and your grandchildren.
Ora

[Karyn]

Sounds like we're all in the same boat. I have a grandson almost 3 who I started babysitting full time 4 months ago when I stopped working. I have two more grandchildren due in Jan and June so I will be busy. I didn't expect to spend my lesiure years babysitting but I am having the time of my life and truthfully what else would I be doing?? I mean shopping gets old after awhile so silly for the mothers to spend all that money on daycare when I'm home. I actually had to do that so now I am spending the time with the grandchildren I missed out on with my own girls and have so much more wisdom and patience. So far its going great and my husband is retired too so I have the luxery of running out alone when I need to and actually the grandson follows grandpa around alot. Things will change when the babies come but it will work out. I wish I could find a playgroup for grandma's in the area. I see alot of moms have them. Have you heard of any.
Like I said, things are going good with my daughter and myself. But then I'm her mom. I think it could be different with a son since the mom would most likely do and see things different. But so far we're doing good.

[Karyn]

Hello ladies. May I join you in your chats. I'm a grandmother of a 3 week and a 3 year and another due in June. All boys. I have twp daughters 25 and 27 giving me all these grandson's and I love it. Taking care of them while mom is at work and I wouldn't have it any other way. I get them back soon as mom is off on maternity and life is boring without him around. With the new baby I'll probably regret saying that but I think my friends look at me like what am I doing but I truly love it. Those mom clubs you see in the parks would be nice for grandma sitters but we keep busy enough. Oh, and remember my husband is home during the day and a big help as well. At least with the older grandson. It takes a couple of months before those men are comfortable alone with those tiny ones.
I'm in Northern California. Sunny day today and looking forward to spring though I haven't completed all my inside winter jobs I promised I'd do in the winter. A
couple closets on the agenda for next week.

[MaryH]

well we have 4yr triplets.BBG
my daughter and other Grandma moved in their house for the 1st 6wks having them home..I'm a retired Special Ed teacher and enjoyed traveling with my hubby until this amazing birth. Since 3 month of age..the girl has been spening overnights with us..I run the kids to Pk twice a week...and grand-daughter to ballet once a week. We are so involved in thier lives..this week everyone was sick but her and us..so she's been hee for a week! we call her family a couple of times during the day so she wont miss em too much! I go to every dr. appt with them..sit in on parent conferences..etc.. everything is so different than when our kids were young! and we're having so much fun..some days Im worn to a frazzle..but then when I hear those little voices call me or just want a hug..I melt! They have kept me YOUNG!!! (p.s.) I am 57yr next month!

[sadgradma]

I been reading your wonderful stories about being a grandma, Congrats all! I wish with all my heart that my story was as pretty as all yours.... I'm a grandma of 3 boys and 2 step grand daughters, My oldest grandson is 6 years old and I was asked to baby sit him by my son and DIL, I was a little relented to do it at first only because I have menieres disease (ear problem) but I agree to do it anyway to help them out, at the time my grandson was onl 2 months old and had been taking care of him till a couple weeks ago so needless to say how strong of bond we have, I couldn't take care the other 2 because it got to be to much for me to handle because of my disease but I would take them in weekends or every chance I got, In all these years I have been accused of favoring my first grandson because I couldn't baby sit the other 2 but the truth of the matter is, I love them all in a different way because all 3 of them have different personalities, If I buy 1 something I always make sure I buy the others something too, I'm tired of being call names by them and hearing how I favorite my oldest in a daily basis, First of all, I did NOT asked to baby sit him nor to have them in my house on weekends while they go party with friends, I pick them up from pre school and elementery daily and babysit to the point where I don't have a life with my husband, I buy them clothes for school every year at their request but it does not seem to be enough...I guess what I'm trying to say. I don't mind doing everything I do if they had a little respect for me! Am I wrong for thinking this way? I need your advice please! I don't know what else to do!
Thanks, sadgrandma