[gptrp]

For someone who has just been married for less than 2 years, I have been through a lot. Maybe its all my fault cause I let myself dragged into this marriage anyway. My husband kicked me on my lowback and slapped me when I was pregnant all because I vented and broke a plastic comb. I was on a bedrest then because of preeclampsia (high blood pressure in pregnancy) but he did it anyway. I have learned to forgive that because I have to, I can't be in anymore stress or negativity because my child is quite in a struggle already. Now, he does not hurt me physically anymore, but emotionally, he is killing me. He treats our househelp with more respect. He accussed me of taking my family's side than his (do I have to take sides on the first place, he demands me to take his). He ignores my mom which I think is disrespectful. I cannot talk to him about these issues because he gets mad. The last time I did try to open this up, he ended smacking the wall with his elbows. He does not show any affection anymore. He is just being civil. I have talked to his sister about this, asking advice on how to handle him, she said that it is best just to shut up whenever he is having a bad temper because that is the way their mother handles their controlling, bad-tempered father. Should I do that? How can I defy the image he has of marriage that women should just submit to their husbands and women should just shut up about it. How can I encourage him to think that "to respect" does not mean "to fear." It has been an emotional struggle for me and thank God I have my baby to draw my strength and love from. How...

[mcmama]

You are being abused. Leave. Now. For your own health and safety, and that of your family. He will not change, and you cannot make him change. You have no power over him. You have power over you, your destiny, and that of your children.

The blows will start again. He has got you so hornswoggled into believing that you have some power or control. You don't. You are powerless as long as you are there.

I am very serious. Leave.

You cannot draw strength from your baby. You are drawing motivation, a reason to live, a reason to continue and not succumb to what he is grinding you down to.

Take the baby and leave while you can.

The man is an affront to the Christian God, and to the Apostle Paul, who instructs wives to be submissive to their husbands (ie, let them lead) and husbands to treat the wife as if she were a part of their own body, to LOVE their wives. An abuser who uses Christianity as an excuse to abuse does not understand loving his own body - and is cowardly enough to take it out on you.

Leave. Please.

[bridge02]

Your post is shocking. I am so sorry for what you have been through. You must leave this man. You deserve better and will get better when you move on. Do you have a place to go? There are lots of places for women and children to go to escape from abusive relationships.
It sounds like your husband is following the footsteps of his father. If you do not leave him your child will think his behavior is acceptable. They will most likely seek relationships where they are abused or are the abuser when they become adults. So please, please do what you need to do. If not for yourself - for you child.