[tu1tym]

Hi all,
I haave just found this website and I thought I would share some of my experiences of living with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), Depression, PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and Alcohol Dependancy.
I was finally diagnosed with these when I was admitted to hospital for trying to kill myself 2 months ago. I was so screwed up that I didnt know or care what I was doing to myself and those around me. All I wanted to do was stop the pain and hurt inside me that was tearing me apart.
I didnt know anything about BPD or PTSD when I was diagnosed and the doctors werent much help so I have turned to the web to try and find out as much as I can about them and why/how they affect my life.
I currently have problems with
#extreme unexplained anger that happens at the drop of a hat for no reason
#constant suicidal thoughts
#extreme risk taking
#unbelievable feelings of being abandoned by everyone around me
#severe feelings of emptyness
#not knowing who or what I am
#intense fear of males
#intense fear of being in house alone
and the list goes on.
I would like to be able to talk to or hear from anyone else that suffers from BPD or PTSD. It seems there is plenty of help out there for those that suffer from the "common" mental illnesses like Bi-Polar, Depression, etc but not for those that are just as bad but fortunately less "common".
Thanks for reading

[QueenAngie]

Welcome to the board!

I have some general advise that I think is helpful
in almost everyone's life:

*Take your medication as prescribed every day.

*Eat nutritious meals.

*Drink 6-8 glasses of water each day, unless advised not to do so.

*Keep a daily journal/diary.

*Clean a part of your home or apartment every day.

*Get outside every day to enjoy the sunshine.

*Walk every day morning and evening.

*Exercise 3 - 4 times per week.

*Keep your doctor/counselor appointments.

*Daily pray, meditate, have a quiet time.

Let us know how things go for you, my dear.

[beth]

Originally Posted by tu1tym

Hi all,
I haave just found this website and I thought I would share some of my experiences of living with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), Depression, PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and Alcohol Dependancy.
I was finally diagnosed with these when I was admitted to hospital for trying to kill myself 2 months ago. I was so screwed up that I didnt know or care what I was doing to myself and those around me. All I wanted to do was stop the pain and hurt inside me that was tearing me apart.
I didnt know anything about BPD or PTSD when I was diagnosed and the doctors werent much help so I have turned to the web to try and find out as much as I can about them and why/how they affect my life.
I currently have problems with
#extreme unexplained anger that happens at the drop of a hat for no reason
#constant suicidal thoughts
#extreme risk taking
#unbelievable feelings of being abandoned by everyone around me
#severe feelings of emptyness
#not knowing who or what I am
#intense fear of males
#intense fear of being in house alone
and the list goes on.
I would like to be able to talk to or hear from anyone else that suffers from BPD or PTSD. It seems there is plenty of help out there for those that suffer from the "common" mental illnesses like Bi-Polar, Depression, etc but not for those that are just as bad but fortunately less "common".
Thanks for reading

Hi tu1tym,
Although it does seem like there is plenty of help around for the so-called "bigger" illnesses of bipolar and schizophrenia, for example, the reality is that the funding for mental health is appalling. Looking at your list of symptoms, there are a few that cerainly fall into the category of BPD and PTSD yet there are others that do not. For you to have BPD, you have to fulfill several criteria and have had the symptoms for your entire adult life ie, it is part of your psychological makeup. You can read my articles on BPD here.
The not wanting to be home alone can be a result of PTSD, or it may form part of agoraphobia. Have you had a recent trauma or an incident of sexual assault that could account for your diagnosis with PTSD? The rage reactions could be a sign of this too.Certainly the fear you have of males is not part of a specific disorder but is likely due to an incident or incidents in your past.
You sound like you have been through an awful time. Always being on a knife's edge, having a sense of lack of self, needing to take risks to ease the pain -- it's all extremely difficult stuff to deal with and it's on a daily basis as well. Have a read of my articles on BPD, there is hope for a better life. I also have articles on PTSD and depression, sinply click on the Mental Health link below.
If you feel I could be of professional help to you, simply click on the link to my online counseling site, also below. Best wishes and hold on! Beth