[JeanLynn81]

My mom spent last week in the hospital again. Her brain was swelling, causing her to act strange. It wasn't as bad as last time, because she was somewhat coherrent. She could remember the date and everything but was really delayed in her responses. She was walking strangely, rubbing her face and head alot, and had a permanent grin on her face. So I called her doctor and we took her to the er. She not only had swelling but her counts were bad. Very dehydrated and white cell count was up.

We knew she was sick, but she just had her first chemo treatment and few days beforehand, so we conributed her illness to that. Also she just started taking her lorazapam (sp?) and we thought that could have affected her as well. She had another rash from the chemo too. Just so much at once, so we just kept in constant contact with her doctor's office.

Ok now that I got all that out, my real concern is how to get my mom to eat properly.

http://forums.families.com/foods-tha...t-cancer,t3182 This thread has some great info but my questions go further than that topic does so I thought I'd start a new thread.

I want my mom to eat healthier and take better care of herself, but she is more stubborn than a bull when it comes to being cared for. Let's just say if she makes it to a nursing home, she will NOT be the nurses favorite.

We are lucky to get her to eat one good meal a day. The other two meals are Ensures. Her doctor told her that if she can't eat, its ok to substitute that...but she went overboard on that and thinks its ok to eat one meal and drink two ensures a day. This is ridiculous! I'm sure it also not what the doctor had in mind when he said that! I think he meant a substitution once in awhile. Am I right to think this?

And I know some of you are nurses or have had to care for a sick person before...how do I get her to cooperate and eat more? I understand that its hard for her to eat, but if she keeps eating like this, her stomach will surely shrink to the size of a pea! I can nurse my child back to health because she is small and not so stubborn. But getting my mom to listen to me is next to impossible.

I really appreciate any advice I can get. Thanks!

[JeanLynn81]

I also want to mention that the chemo she is doing now is much stronger than what she did last time. Last round of chemo was done weekly, and now its done every three weeks. So I'm thinking that it did contribute to her illness and not feeling well. Do you think that because she went to the hospital, that they might change the treatment? Should that be something that I discuss with her doctor? Can her doctor even talk to me about her treatments? Hmmm...

Don't worry...we just got the POA paperwork the day before yesterday. I know that needs to be done.

What a big giant mess life can be sometimes.

[wanttobemommy]

When I worked in the nursing home as a CNA they got the three structered meals a day and three snacks. Healthy ones. The ones that were too sick to go to the dining room were given meals in their room. If they refused to eat we would ask them to drink a boost and an ensure. That way they are hydrated and have some nutriants. I was the CNA that would go into the mean old mens room (one guy refused to eat for everyone... long story short he ended up being my fav resident until he passed) And would joke and kid and try to get him to take a couple of bites of food. I would start by making sure she has access to healthy snacks things you know she likes such as grapes, crackers and cheese, any fruit. The nursing home made 'healthy' jello by using 100% fruit juice instead of water. We snuck in nutriants and vitamins anywhere we could.

[QueenAngie]

Hugs & prayers too, Jean!

Have to agree w/ Kristen's good advise of offering 3 meals/3 snacks or 6 small meals a day.

Put out some healthy snacks on the kitchen table or where she sits to watch tv. She may nibble on them.

Is she taking a multivitamin each day? Sounds like she needs to drink more water too.

Offer drinks w/ a straw. Easier to go down.

Have a 'drinking' contest w/ the family. Everybody in the room drink a glass of water at the same time. Sounds silly, but if it is a social event, goes easier. "Bottoms up!" Even get your DD involved. Grandma will do things for the grandkids too.

Is the twice a day Ensure giving her diarrhea?

Make some milkshakes w/ hidden nutrition in them too.

(((Hugs)))

[MommaColleen]

When my father was on hospice in my home over the summer we tried EVERTHING to get some good stuff into him. When we would make him oatmeal or cream of wheat (2 of his favorites) we used ensure as the liquid. Also, milk shakes were a hit with him since his throat was always dry. Again, we made them with the ensure. We also used it as creamer in his coffee.

HTH a little and to you

[MommaColleen]

PS, yes the lorazapam (sp?) does some odd things to a person. My Dad had mood swings from one end of the spectrum to the other when he was on that stuff.

Oh, and don't feel bad if she does not eat. It was a LOT of work for my dad to eat (my Dad was end stage though). It took all of his strength to sit up long enough to eat a meal. We eventually had to get the bed side tray and prop him up in his bed to eat. I even got to the point where I was feeding him.

[mcmama]

Cancer patients often don't feel like eating. Continue to have food available, but understand that she may prefer to have the supplement instead.

My mom used to get cravings for baked potato, bananas, and Wendy's chocolate Frosties. We also used to keep halloween size chocolate bars around. It was just enough.

Simple foods that provide instant gratification and are not difficult to chew or filling might appeal. Also, is the medication giving her sores in her mouth? One of my mom's friends had that, and she found that her breakfast in the morning of an omelet was satisfying and did not irritate her sores.