[1128Ryan]

Hey all, this is my first time on this site. Yesterday, I met my birth mother for the first time. It went very well and I am glad to have had it happen. Now, comes the FUN part. How do I bring this up in casual conversation to my birth mother who will be at my house today? She can be very touchy about this and has flopped around in the past, saying that she would help me find my birth mother then, when my wife got pregnant, I told her I wanted to find out about my birth mother, she said why would you want to know about her? So I am thinking that this might be tough and would like some advice on how to approach this touchy subjuect. Thanks


Ryan

[JeanLynn81]

I have never been through this before, but I know there are lots of girls here who have, and have the answers you are looking for. I just wanted to wish you luck, and say I am here cheering you on!

I had a thought though. When you tell your adoptive mother, try putting on your biggest grin, and give her the biggest hug, and say "After meeting her, it really made me even more grateful that your are my mom. It made me realize just how lucky I have been all along! No one is better than you mom!" I think as long as you reinforce that she is not being replaced, it should help.

Really though, best of luck to you. Keep me updated!

[QueenAngie]

Jean has shared excellent advise. Tell her how much you love her and that you are the great adult today because of all her love, caring, and guidance all these years.

[1128Ryan]

Well, it was yesterday and I told them. They were about as excited to find out information as I was. Apparently, Chatolic Charities called them and told them to come get me one day, so they didn't know much about anything. It really was great!!!

Thank you all for the advice!

[oweirdo]

I am glad it went well for you and your parents!

[mom2threeqts]

Hey! I'm a mom to a beautiful little boy from Korea (we adopted him when he was an infant) and I just want to tell you that I'm really glad that things went well. You should have your parents there as a support system for you while you process all the new information you have about where you came from. I think a lot of people would be surprised how very important it is to adoptive parents...that their children are able to find the answers that they seek. Your history is your history and it may be difficult to understand why many things happen the way they do...but at least you now know WHAT happened and can begin trying to understand why. Even if you never get to that point, you now how more answers to your questions.