[ggcr]

This is my first time posting... I am single male, 54, never married. About three years ago I started a relationship with a 24 year old female. We used to sit on benches on a park and talk. That changed we started going on lunch dates. She finally admitted she was pregnant not by me but by another guy "she knows she will not see him/he does not know her." Never were intimate. Extent of affection was only arms around her and dances in bars. She gave birth about 5 weeks ago. I told her I was still in love with her and want to care for baby as mine. Previously she used to phone me at the beginning I had her phone number then she changed it with the story it was her mom's so I could not call her. Now she says she will get a new one but she wants me to call her. She lives with granma now, altho I have her address her granma does not want visits. She says we will start doing things together, soon... The past 5 months have been hell. Plans to do things and go to places that never panned out. She stated she did care for me but only once. At the same time I have heard lots of stories from her that in reality, I need to hear her say she cares for me more see her more and a little affection from her yet I understand that she has to adapt to her new life as a mom. I asked for a kiss on the lips she retorted "no that is when having sex." Later I was holding hands/playing with her fingers she wanted to stop said "that makes me feel as if we are having sex." All this time I have been passing her money. I tried to tell her I feel she was slipping away from me, she exploded when I tried to bring back the topic. Feel after all her stories and dates that did not pan out she will not want to go out and use the excuse of returning to work not to go out on dates. Obviously we have lots of issues we have to solve. Questions: 1. Is it normal for a new mother to not even want to hold hands or have a man play with her fingers? 2. How will I know if she is really interested in me and not giving me stories so I keep passing her money? 3. Or is it that I am not being patient enough???

[JeanLynn81]

Hmmm let's see.....counting fingers...then toes...WAIT! I don't have enough fingers and toes to count how many years older you are than her...Hmmm...I think I may see the problem here...

[ayeshamus14]

i dont know how to put this in an uninsulting way :s but it seems as though she see's u more as a 'father figure' >< she doesnt seem as though she is attracted to u in any way , why sell yourself short? there is an amazing women out there somewhere waiting for you to stop playing this girl's game, man up and get over her emotionally so that u have a chance to be true to a women who really wants u.

forget her, stop giving her money and love yourself.dont make yourself get hurt anymore, dont hold onto water because it will always flow through your fingers.u need to find some1 solid

[Magic_Mikki]

Seems like she's really not that attracted to you. I agree with the previous poster that it seems as though she sees you as a father figure and not a potential mate. It might be in your best interest to stop giving her money. I think she might be using you.

[mollymae]

I agree.