[beth]

I've always been interested in studies of identical twins, particularly cases in which one twin will be aware of something happening to the other twin while they are not together. Does anyone have an experience of this, either as a twin themselves, or as a parent of a twin.

[mamaip]

Hi Beth!
I'm an identical twin, and, although I don't have a hair raising story to tell, there was one time when my sister got into an accident while I was at home and I just had this really bad feeling that something was wrong. Other than that, we can very frequently just look at each other and know what the other is thinking.

[beth]

Originally Posted by mamaip

Hi Beth!
I'm an identical twin, and, although I don't have a hair raising story to tell, there was one time when my sister got into an accident while I was at home and I just had this really bad feeling that something was wrong. Other than that, we can very frequently just look at each other and know what the other is thinking.

Hi Cathy,
Thanks for replying. When you say you had a really bad feeling that something was wrong, did you experience any pain similar to what your sister was feeling, or was it more a sense of doom and foreboding?
And with regard to the knowing what each other is thinking part, did this start way back as young children or after puberty? Do you think theireis a dominant partner in the relationship and if so, is it the less dominant one who is the most "sensitive" to the other's feelings? Thanks in advance. Beth

[mamaip]

Hi Beth,
You ask interesting questions that I hadn't even thought about before. When my sister, Beth, was in the car accident I just had this sick feeling like something wasn't right. I didn't feel any pain though. Although I will say that all throughout our childhood we constantly were asked, "If I pinch you will she feel it?" The answer - NO!!!!!!!!!
The whole knowing what the other is thinking thing began when we were children. Not only that, when we were little we shared a room (all through our lives actually) and we would have a really weird sleep pattern. One of us would wake up screaming, usually for some ridiculous reason like we were dreaming about bees or something of that nature, and within seconds we were both out of bed, screaming like lunatics and making a run for the door. We also apparently had conversations with one another in our sleep, according to my mom. Embarassing things to recall but hopefully it provides you with some insight.
And yes, my sister has always been the more dominant twin. She's 8 minutes younger than I am, just so you know. As a child she was a bit of a bully and as we grew she had issues with independence. She hated that my name was said first in conversations (merely coincidence but as a child it didn't matter) and wanted her own life with her own friends. I, on the other hand, was less dominate and very much more aware of her feelings. I am more sensitive by nature, and also more sensitive within our relationship.
Hope this all helps. Have a good day

[beth]

Originally Posted by mamaip

Hi Beth,
You ask interesting questions that I hadn't even thought about before. When my sister, Beth, was in the car accident I just had this sick feeling like something wasn't right. I didn't feel any pain though. Although I will say that all throughout our childhood we constantly were asked, "If I pinch you will she feel it?" The answer - NO!!!!!!!!!
The whole knowing what the other is thinking thing began when we were children. Not only that, when we were little we shared a room (all through our lives actually) and we would have a really weird sleep pattern. One of us would wake up screaming, usually for some ridiculous reason like we were dreaming about bees or something of that nature, and within seconds we were both out of bed, screaming like lunatics and making a run for the door. We also apparently had conversations with one another in our sleep, according to my mom. Embarassing things to recall but hopefully it provides you with some insight.
And yes, my sister has always been the more dominant twin. She's 8 minutes younger than I am, just so you know. As a child she was a bit of a bully and as we grew she had issues with independence. She hated that my name was said first in conversations (merely coincidence but as a child it didn't matter) and wanted her own life with her own friends. I, on the other hand, was less dominate and very much more aware of her feelings. I am more sensitive by nature, and also more sensitive within our relationship.
Hope this all helps. Have a good day

Thanks Cathy for your detailed answer. Much appreciated! Couple more questions, if you can stand it! As the so-called non-dominant twin, would you say that you can "read" Beth's thoughts more than she can read yours? Or would it be 50-50?

Secondly, apart from contagious diseases, have you had similar illnesses during the course of your lifetime? If one of you has had a child, was the other aware of labor starting? I f one of you is very frightened, would the other one know? That should do for now, and thanks for your time. Best wishes, Beth

[seeemilywrite]

I've had really close friends growing up where I have had "bad feelings" right before theywere involved in accidents or have had bad things happen to them. I dont know thatIve ever heard of twins feeling pain for the other (outside of the movies of course).

[mcmama]

What about other multiples, triplets and more? And does this special twinniness apply mostly to identical twins, or are fraternal twins also able to have this special sensitivity toward each other?

[beth]

Originally Posted by mcmama

What about other multiples, triplets and more? And does this special twinniness apply mostly to identical twins, or are fraternal twins also able to have this special sensitivity toward each other?

I guess it should apply to multiples too. I know I have a "strange" bond with my daughter, in that there have been situations where she has been frightened or in pain, and I suddenly become very uncomfortable, yet she is miles away. But there have been numerous studies on identical twins done on this area which is why I posed the original question. It's quite a fascinating subject.

[mamaip]

It IS an interesting topic. My mom actually called me the other day. I'd had a REALLY bad day and she said that she felt all day like something was wrong - so I definitely think intuitions are not limited to twins.
Let's see, as for the question about whether or not we've had similar illnesses, I'd say no. We had ear infections at the same time but living that close together, when one of us got a cold the other was bound to get it. Other than that, no. I got sick much more often than my sister, had my tonsils out, mono, pneumonia, etc. She had none of these things. And about the labor, no, we didn't know and we also don't feel it if the other is frightened. Sure wish we did. It would be neat! But sadly, no, not too much "cosmic coolness" going on with us. Hope that helps!

[beth]

Originally Posted by mamaip

It IS an interesting topic. My mom actually called me the other day. I'd had a REALLY bad day and she said that she felt all day like something was wrong - so I definitely think intuitions are not limited to twins.
Let's see, as for the question about whether or not we've had similar illnesses, I'd say no. We had ear infections at the same time but living that close together, when one of us got a cold the other was bound to get it. Other than that, no. I got sick much more often than my sister, had my tonsils out, mono, pneumonia, etc. She had none of these things. And about the labor, no, we didn't know and we also don't feel it if the other is frightened. Sure wish we did. It would be neat! But sadly, no, not too much "cosmic coolness" going on with us. Hope that helps!

Hi Cathy,
Thanks for getting back with that info. Interesting about your Mom and her phone call. I think this sor tof thing is not uncommon and develops between people who are really close in some way. I'm sure the sceptics would disagree, but let them! It's just as well that you didn't feel your sister's labor pains, but I agree it would be neat to be more cosmically connected at times. After all this thinking, you might start becoming aware of connections that do exist between you and your twin! Thanks again, Beth