[AmericanMrs]

Hi all
I'm new to the site.
I have a 19 yr old with ADHD who is now in the Armed Forces. I also have a 7yr old who was diagnosed with ADHD, Dyspraxia, Dyslexia and CVS in August last year. He is not on medication and certainly is not as bad as my older son was!
His CVS requires frequent hosptial admissions but he is a cheery little boy.
I wrote a verse when my older lad was about 8 yrs old and thought you may like to see it:

A.D.H.D.
I didn’t know how those four letters would effect a change.
The Agony of the unknown to come
The Distance that would spread among us like a thick fog.
Helplessness, calling for help and waiting….still waiting.
Doubts. Many, many doubts.
But using knowledge to turn those four letters into something positive -
Agony into Awareness. Awareness of the things that were always there for me but I just couldn’t see until the fog had lifted.
Doubts to Delight. Delight in the knowledge of a son, a son who is truly gifted despite society pulling him down.
Helplessness into Happiness—how he makes me laugh with his impersonations, the way he can be kind when he focuses on reality.
Doubts to ‘Dear’ (adj) ‘much loved, cherished’.
All those things, which despite the other four, remain constant in the heart of a mother.

Laura

[MiaCamille]

Nice to see you here again, i also have a 7 year old dd with ADHD and it can be so hard sometimes. I enjoyed reading that thank you!

[AmericanMrs]

It is hard work isn't it! It doesn't help when you're out with your ADHD child and get rude comments or stares because people think he's 'just naughty'. ADHD is becoming more of an accepted diagnosis here in the UK but my with elder son it was a complete nightmare as it was less accepted back then (he's 19 now).
Laura

[MiaCamille]

i hear ya....even for us sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it's not her fault that she acts this way. Sadly we had to put her on medication cause she was flunking school, so that helps her alot...But it saddens me also that these beautiful kids are labelled... How does your 19 year old cope with it?

[AmericanMrs]

Sophie, the 19 yr old was a total nightmare! He was medicated when he was 8yrs old after school told us to put him on meds or remove him from the school. When he hit puberty he went completely off the rails, drinking and smoking. He also has ODD. I honestly don't know how we got through that time but we did. I honestly felt I was the only one going through this and once I found support groups it helped us cope so much better.
He has settled down and has been medication free since he was 15 (his choice) as he wanted to join the Army and in the UK they have to be med free for 3 years before they can join. I think that his drive to do the job he really wanted helped him to focus. He realises his limits more now, he is still loud and boisterous but he understands himself better so can cope better.
It's tough but with love and support kids with ADHD can go on to do wonderful things!
Laura

[MiaCamille]

woah heavy years for us to look forward too, she is also loud and very active, i know as she grows older things will get harder...i'm glad to know your son "turned" out ok it gives me hope for my dd... thanks for chatting!

[QueenAngie]

Welcome!

My DS#2 has ADHD and is in college 1st year freshman. He did great working a holiday job for UPS over Nov & Dec. He is off medication this year for the 1st time, his choice.

In the 4th grade, it was really tough, but he had a great teacher. That was a turning point for us and for him. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Consistency is important.
Routines are important.
Along w/ a healthy diet, plenty of exercise, plenty of sleep.

This child will not be a brain surgeon, but as an adult....

I can see him as a great neighbor ~ helping do the lawn or shovel snow for the next door neighbors, in a time of need.

I can see him doing good things at church ~ volunteering with youth or helping with any fund raisers.

I can see him being a great Dad ~ he is so good with his younger cousins.

Just because he is not going to be a brain surgeon, is ok.

He has a sparkle in his eye,
a firm handshake,
a great personality,
he has polite manners,
he has so many other gifts from God,
he'll hold down a good job full time after graduating from college,
buy a home, get married to a nice girl, have cute grandbabies for me.

You should be proud of your son in the military!

[AmericanMrs]

Thats lovely! I am sure your son will continue to do really well.
I am very proud of my son because I know how much it took to get him where he is now.He has also volunteered to play piano in church on a Sunday (he took the decision to not attend church anymore when he was in his teens) so I am pleased he is getting involved again.
Laura

[MiaCamille]

Angie that was beautiful what you said about your ds and it gives me hope for my dd... thanks!

[Kristin1981]

Welcome that was a nice read I liked that poem...
My mom took alot of foster children with ADD and ADHD...
My 21yo sis has it she is off meds but, is very loud,My 19yo bro has it and has done very bad in school he now got himself kicked out the house cause he was just out of control but, you can't force a 19yo to take pills,and my 17yo bro have it and does awful in school sometimes then changes and does really well...
They were a sibling group from Oklahoma my mom adopted...