[jkvkdailey]

Last Thursday my DS Vince was pushed off a snowbank and landed - face first - onto a plastic driveway marker. The plastic pole punctured his face (just to the left of his lip), and he ended up getting 7 stitches. The stitches came out yesterday and he will be fine, but I'm still more than a little ticked at the neighbors.

The 2 boys were playing "King of the Hill" and the neighbor pushed my son off the snowbank. I know that the injury wasn't intentional, and I am not mad that it happened, but I am very upset that we have not heard from the neighbors at all. Some of our other neighbors called (after they saw the ambulance in our driveway) to make sure everything was OK, but this neighbor didn't come over, didn't call - nothing. I am not blaming the neighbor for what happened (because kids will be kids, and my son is very rambunctious), but I am surprised at how inconsiderate the family is being. If the situation were reversed, I would have been calling and/or going over to the neighbor's immediately, to see if I could do anything. I would have certainly made my son apologize (even if it was an accident).

I walk Vince to the bus stop each morning, and the neighbor boy won't even look at us. He arrives late to the bus stop (ever since this happened - before he was on time or early), and the bus driver is getting sick of waiting for him. Vince has also asked if the neighbor boy can come over and play, but so far I haven't let him (I was using the excuse that his stitches were still in, but now they are out).

I am looking for some advice - should I just let it go and allow the neighbor boy to come over again? Should I call the mom and tell her what happened (BTW, I'm pretty sure she has already heard from the other neighbors)? Or should I continue my bout of silence, hoping that she will eventually call to see how Vince is??

Kim

[mollymae]

Why don't you go over and have a chat with them. They are probably embaressed and thinking that they will let the dust settle to avoid any heated arguements. Like you said the boys were playing and probably pushing and shoving each other so it's just one of those things. The neighbours kid is probably scared to death you going to yell at him. He's only a little boy and perhaps you need to let him know your not mad, but they both need to be less rough and more careful in future.

You say your son has invited him to come play but you've not allowed it. Is it possible your son has said to him "My mom says your not allowed to play with me anymore"

[ccoconutt3]

i think that you should clear the air and talk to the parents....if you don't you will forever hold a grudge against this little boy! it could have been the other way around- accidents do happen and unfortunately it was your baby that got hurt this time. boys are rough and get hurt. tell the parents what happened and try to be sensitive that they will stick up for their kid as parents always do....just explain the behavoir was a little too rough...they boy could have gotten a good talking to from his parents already...

[mcmama]

Yeah, you be the bigger person. At least you know you have done right by the kids.

Some people are just weird. When my kids were growing up, there was a couple on our street who let their three year old daughter go up and down ringing doorbells looking for someone to play with. They never checked on her. She would be at our door at 7 am.

When I invited her to a birthday party, she came - I insisted the parents actually talk to me. They just were ready to send her down the block, oh, they were busy. I had to practically run after them to tell them WHEN to pick the kid up - and WHEN I would be sending her home because we weren't going to stick around after cleanup. They got the message. Then the attitude was like thanks for putting up with her. That wasn't the point - the kid was fine, but she was like the block orphan.

Knock on the door just to let them know your son is fine, and talk about how you both can keep kids safe.

[jkvkdailey]

Thank you for all your suggestions. I did talk to the mother tonight, she didn't even know how serious the injury was! Apparently her husband had told her Vince was injured, but that was about it. I told her that I understand accidents happen, but I would have appreciated an apology for Vince (I didn't bring him with me). She said she will make sure her son apologizes and I reassured her that he is still allowed to play with Vince, there will be no hard feelings. It went well, so I'm glad I did it.

Thanks everyone!

Kim

[mollymae]

I'm glad the air was cleared. It's horrible living with an atmosphere in the neighbourhood. You've set a great example to your son. Well Done.

[pinball9818]

Excellent. Never assume that somebody knows you are upset with them. Chances are, if you do, they will not know the extent of your feelings. My Dr. Phil moment.