[Tracey with 6]

Are we as a society pushing our children o grow up too fast? I mean, counting at 18 months, alphabet and colours from the minute they're born, baby signing ? really when did it become so important to grow up so fast, is it still acceptable to have little ones be kids ?I guess this is a hang on from my extra curricular thread but more about they way some parents are highly competetive about milestones in childrens development.

[DivasMomma]

I dont push Jae at all....she is all about the TV....learns everything from there. I say all the time about how I was almost happy Kaydee was a preemie, so maybe she would take her time growing up. Apparently with walking I was way off, but at least she isnt talking my ear off yet!!

[vanaden]

You are so right. It gets really annoying to hear people bragging and trying to make you feel like crap because their kid "knows" more than yours does. It's just another way for people to make eachother feel inferior.

[kalhayd2]

Yep. Why compare Apples to Oranges. I get SO sick of hearing What your kid can do.. Woo freakin' hoo!!
Babies develop at their own pace. I agree, time to calm down!!

[swt1899]

In Texas they are pushing kids TOO hard! I teach junior high and we are teaching 6th graders chemistry and physics. It is nuts! Our school district begins teaching reading in kindergarten which isn't a required grade for all. So if they didn't go to kindergarten, they are already behind when they get to 1st grade.
All in the name to be the best in the world... it is stressing our kids out! I have 6th graders getting ulcers about the TAKS test (our state mandated test) and if they don't pass, they don't go on to the next grade.
What a shame!

[Tracey with 6]

that is stupid! I have the problme here, because my kids aren't in daycare they go into prep( pre school) behind the kids who have been in full time daycare since they were 6 weeks old, now I don't judge mums who go back to work but why is it this way??

[jmmv08]

I think there’s no need to stress kids on learning too fast just because others are like that. I’m not in favor of comparing them.

[twinzplus3]

I think we're pushing them too young but not hard enough when they get older to be honest. The basics of chemistry and physics is very reasonable for a 6th grader IMO. In fact, that's along the lines of things I will be teaching my own children at that age. But I think I've seen this switch from Kinder that mostly is about playing and learning basics to super academics. Then we get them to middle school and its all about coddling them so they feel secure and prepared.

[fostermommy]

I learned the hard way that over-preparing your kids for early school is only going to create problems later. I don't think that I "pushed" my kids - but they were very inquisitive kids who asked a lot of questions and presented many "teaching" opportunities for me. I really grasped those teaching opportunities - perhaps looking for them a bit too feverishly - and began teaching them every chance I got. But - when they went to public school, they were bored out of their minds. And from there ---- the battles began. Teachers and administration had no way of identifying "gifted and talented" kids apart from "overprepared" kids, and so they refuse to offer any additional programming until after 3rd grade. By 3rd grade, those pushy parents have usually backed off a bit because their kid is in school all day and usually is no longer willing to participate in the rigors of parent "instruction." However, by that time, even gifted kids have been bored out of their minds for 4 years, have developed a negative attitude about school, and have developed some rotten study habits that often last a lifetime. It's not worth it. Kids who are truly advanced will learn their alphabet and numbers, etc well and quickly regardless of the timing. They won't need daily drilling with flashcards and constant parent quizzing. Kids who are truly advanced will seek out unique learning opportunities, and that is where parents can really enhance their child's education. Frequent trips to the library to find books that cover a variety of topics and genre; trips to the zoo to not only see the animals but to learn about their habitat, participation in community service projects to gain a better understanding of socioeconomic diversity, etc. And so, even though our kids started out learning their basics really early (not an advantage for them in the end) they enjoyed learning so much more when we could provide real life learning opportunities for them that are not often offered in the school. So - while Johnny could repeat his ABC's forward, backward, and sideways, my kid could explain things to Johnny that were life-lessons and applicable throughout the educational process. Oh - and also - instead of spending time expecting kids to repeat numbers and letters over and over again - I have found that they develop a much greater appreciation for reading (which certainly is what those silly letters are all about anyway) by having books available in every room of the house, stopping in my tracks and reading to my child every time he asks me to, and pointing to simple words as I read them. My 2 year old can't identify a single letter when asked, but he spontaneously identifies and reads aloud words like In, Out, Dog, Mom, Dad, etc. In my opinion, this puts him on a great path for the enjoyment of learning and a well-rounded childhood.
The previous poster is right - the kids need to be pushed a bit more in middle school and late elementary school - there's quite a bit of coddling going on. In high school, suddenly the "successful" ones are expected to be at college level. Because there is so much more to learn in school now than there was in the past, early elementary kids have to start out more prepared. Folks who don't use daycare would probably be doing their kids a favor by putting them into pre-school at 3 or 4 to learn those early play and social (and pre-reading) skills. These opportunities and skills can also be acquired by participating in organized playgroups, structured brief learning opportunities at home with fun workbooks, etc. Gone are the days when we could simply keep our kids at home until they enter Kinder at age 5 - expecting the academics to start there. The academics had to have at least started at home. But at 18 months??? For heaven's sake.
This is just my opinion from my experience. I've made a few assumptions along this parenting journey - most related to public education - and have had some frustrating lessons along the way.

[MommyDee]

Kids are being pushed waaay too fast IMO... Gabriel, in kindergarten, has homework three days a week, plus a library book each week, plus little "optional" activities they're supposed to do. We spend up to an hour some days on his homework -- sometimes longer -- and while I know he does require extra help due to his difficulties, I also know that some of the other kids spend a significant amount of time on it as well. Now they're planning to start sending home even MORE reading work during the week -- I think it's atrocious, they're not getting a chance to be little kids!

As for pushing at home... all we did was let things flow naturally. We sang the abc song, taught him how to count, helped him learn to identify letters when he was ready for it, read to him every day. As a game we started showing him how to add using his fingers -- he gets a kick out of that. The only things we truly wanted him to know before starting kindergarten were recognizing uppercase letters, counting to 20, recognizing numbers 0-9, and having the necessary play skills and independence (we did send him to daycare for a couple of months before school for the social experience). The absolute basics. Anything more than that was a bonus to us.