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MonFriend - a few bits of info - at grad level psych classes we were told that incest hits one in ten families, this is about the same statistics for car accidents, how tthe culprits are most often the most trusted members of the family and other info to help council those who have been traumatized. It happens to boys and to girls, no ages are exempt. Has your daughter been told that was the man's illness and not hers? Has she gone to talk it out? Lots of issues ruin marriages, a traumatized little girl is already going into a marriage with one hand tied behind her back. She needs to talk and talk and talk because she can start locking up after the first few years of wedded romance, or test any fellow who finds her attractive for the rest of her life. Abuse has a long, long arm, just as trauma does.
The abuse wasn't a 5 minute issue, neither will her becoming untraumitized, she needs to accept that. Point out how many little boys are finally discussing what happened to them in the vestigages of what we percieve as safety, churches. How it's a well kept secret because the child is so afraid. And you, you need help just as much as she does, This revelation has changed you whether you realize it or not. You're as much a victim as she is. Grieve for her, grieve for yourself. Then thank life that there is still much more to live and to enjoy.
As a reseacher, I often wonder who hasn't been abused in one way or another.
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