[JeanLynn81]

My dd's therapist has brought up on more than one occasion that Alyssa lacks self calming skills.

Now I know she does, and I am trying to figure out where I wronged this child that now she can't calm herself down!

I know sharing a bedroom with her has been a giant factor in this. I really do not have any options. Therapists have suggested numerous things, but nothing I have the money for. Plus, I rent. I can't literally build her a room within my room. Its just not possible.

Me and the therapists have been brainstorming on ways to develop her self calming skills without having her own bedroom.

The single most frustrating thing about this, is knowing that I have to make a plan, then stick to it. Well, I've made a plan a long time ago, stuck to it, and have found that its not working. So, if I find another plan, and stick to it for awhile, then it doesn't work....its just taking too long to fix a big problem. Does that make any sense?

Does anyone have any advice for me?

[angelic_ky]

i know you were looking into Alyssa with autism... autistic children do tend to lack self calming skills; i don' think it's anything that you have done wrong, just something more you need to teach her

[poliscmjr]

I wish I had advice for you. I'm sure you did not do anything wrong.

[ruthann8]

Does her therapist specialize in autistic children? B/c I hate when people who don't fully understand the issues or don't have first hand experience give advice. I personally don't think having her own bedroom will help but I haven't ever worked with an autistic child. Sharing your room with her has helped her bond with you and makes her feel safe and secure. That in itself provides comfort and calm to a child. Don't ever feel liked you wronged her. If possible, I would find a behaviorist that works with special needs children and at has some experience with autism.

[JeanLynn81]

The specialists really do not understand autism fully. They are not trained to I guess...its for her speech, and all she officially has is a "speech delay"..not autism. Alyssa's pediatrician will not even send her off for autism testing until she is 3...but the special school district is stepping in and next month will send her off for testing themselves, because she's starting a special school on Aug. 14th and needs it before then. So...we just have to make it until then to find teachers who understand and give accurate advice. Its like tug of war/advice here. Everyone thinks they know whats best for her, leaving me very confused sometimes. If that even made any sense.

[mollymae]

Is it a speech problem or a language understanding problem?

Josh has a expressive and receptive language delay. He gets very frustrated because he can't not understand what i'm saying to him.