[jkl123]

Hi,

First, great job fo rmaking it this far! Soooo many would've thrown in the towel by now.
I had the exact same problem with Jack - he'd wake every half hour to an hour the first few months... no, actually, til just the past two months or so. It went on for a long time. And that was just one to deal with! My pedi re-assured me it is normal. He also said that if I let him fuss for a bit longer - say, 20 minutes - then he would be more likely to fill up and sleep longer at a time. he had a habit of just snacking. I wasn't really OK with doing that, but out of desperation, I tried it and it worked! He also said if I did not co-sleep, it would probably help for longer stretches between feedings (out of site, out of mind theory, I guesss), but am still not willing to give up co-sleeping with my baby!

Samuel, I do not believe the US supports breast milk banks, as a lot of other countries do. The FDA would have a big objection, and of course, there would be complicated legalities (like, if the baby got HIV from the donated milk, there could be a lawsuit, ad we all know how Americans love to sue! ) Also... Val, correct me if I am wrong... but doesn't a Momma's breast milk change as the baby grows to accomadate their caloric needs and nutrients?? So, if you were to use donated breast milk, wouldn't it be possible the nutrients in that aren't necessarily what the baby needs at his/her age??

Anyway, don't be too hard on yourself! We all commend you for putting in this effort for your lil ones!

[purelegance]

there are breast milk donation agencies, but they are very few. you & your breastmilk go through a lot of testing before it is accepted for use. i looked into it when i lived in delaware, but there weren't any close to me at the time. Here is a map of some milk banks,
as you can see there aren't many, but i'm sure there are several other organizations. (like this map doesn't have one in NYC, but i find it hard to believe there's not a single one there.)

you're doing a great job momma! it's hard work, but it's all worth it in the end. and like val said, there's nothing wrong with having DH give the twins a bottle of formula so you can get a little rest!

and also, i think your friend who has an 8 wk old sleeping a full 8 hours without waking is completely fibbing.

[Samual]

Originally Posted by jkl123

Hi,

First, great job fo rmaking it this far! Soooo many would've thrown in the towel by now.
I had the exact same problem with Jack - he'd wake every half hour to an hour the first few months... no, actually, til just the past two months or so. It went on for a long time. And that was just one to deal with! My pedi re-assured me it is normal. He also said that if I let him fuss for a bit longer - say, 20 minutes - then he would be more likely to fill up and sleep longer at a time. he had a habit of just snacking. I wasn't really OK with doing that, but out of desperation, I tried it and it worked! He also said if I did not co-sleep, it would probably help for longer stretches between feedings (out of site, out of mind theory, I guesss), but am still not willing to give up co-sleeping with my baby!

Samuel, I do not believe the US supports breast milk banks, as a lot of other countries do. The FDA would have a big objection, and of course, there would be complicated legalities (like, if the baby got HIV from the donated milk, there could be a lawsuit, ad we all know how Americans love to sue! ) Also... Val, correct me if I am wrong... but doesn't a Momma's breast milk change as the baby grows to accomadate their caloric needs and nutrients?? So, if you were to use donated breast milk, wouldn't it be possible the nutrients in that aren't necessarily what the baby needs at his/her age??

Anyway, don't be too hard on yourself! We all commend you for putting in this effort for your lil ones!

You can donate breast milk until your child is 6 months old in the UK they try to match the patients age, to the age of the mothers baby as best they can as well, you have to be tested to ensure you are HIV free and free of other illnesses/diseases. Here all sick babies under six months are fed on breast milk in hospital, either mums milk or donated milk. Most of our milk banks are close to large children's hospitals.
The surplus is sold onto people like us who cannot provide breast milk naturally

[quagmire8]

I wish people were more open to breastmilk and breastfeeding in general. To quote my grandmother "I just cant see doing that--its kinda gross" yes, my GRANDMOTHER.

If the mother of a brand new micropreemie (under 1000 grams or 28 weeks) is pumping breast milk, our neonatologist will usually start giving small feeds (1ml every 3-4 hours) within 2 days of life, but if a mom refuses to pump breast milk they will put off feeding for a week or longer. It is just so important. Also, it is rare that we see a preemie receiving breast milk get necrotizing entercolitis (a deadly inflammation of the bowel), but do see it much more in formula fed preemies. I know some hospitals (in other areas of the country) DO use donated breast milk, but just not any around here.

On a side note--the twins had their second night in their separate beds. It did not go as well as last night. They woke up about every hour and a half each--I did not get more than 45 minutes of sleep at a time. I know that formula supplement is inevitable for me to get some form of sleep. I will give it a few more days just in case it is a growth spurt at an odd time. They really were doing well last week (Elise sleeping 5 hours and Eliot sleeping 4 at a time). Sigh.

[twinzplus3]

That's okay if you have to supplement. It might only be for growth spurts. . .you never know.

My suggestion is to pick a time that is reasonable for you and your spouse for you to get some sleep. . .and that's the block of time that unless the house is burning down you do not get disturbed.

So for me. . .I went to bed at 8pm to 12am. The twins went on a walk with dad at 8pm. If they needed to eat he fed them. . .usually bm but sometimes formula. . .I didn't stress over what I had bc that would defeat the purpose. Sometimes they were awake at 12am and I had to take over. . .and other times they slept till 2am. But those 4 guaranteed hours of sleep helped me significantly in those days.

[DK615617]

Originally Posted by purelegance

and also, i think your friend who has an 8 wk old sleeping a full 8 hours without waking is completely fibbing.

She might not be fibbing. Jessica slept through the night starting at about 3 or 4 weeks, and she would sleep from 8 pm till 6 am!!!!! It was unreal. And she was exclusively BF.
I don't know how I got so lucky with her, but now she is giving me a run for my money.
So any friend who brags about a sleeping baby will at one point in time or another be pulling her hair out trying to get that baby back to sleeping the way they once did.
Jessica is killing me! Between her and TT, and sometimes the dog, I haven't slept well at all in the past month.

I hope all goes well tonight for you, I hope they let you have at least 4 hours in a row.
Hang in there, before long they will be running around and you will be chasing them around the house!!!

[preemiemom3]

I was able to donate over 3000 oz of breastmilk to a milk bank in Colorado. I had to have a medical exam and get blood drawn and then send my blood sample and all of the milk to Colorado, but the milk bank was amazing and shipped all of the boxes to me empty so all I had to do was fill them up and send them back with UPS. It was a great experience. I had so much milk leftover after pumping for my preemie for 3 months.

[twinzplus3]

I don't mean to poo poo the milk bank idea folks, but the reality is that it is just not easy to get milk from a milk bank in the US in general. I think in theory it is a great idea. . .but the realities of it not being easy to get a hold of coupled with the fact that we are talking about twins. . .it's just not practical. Can't speak for the OP but I think other suggestions, empathy, and 'atta girl's. . .would be very welcome.

[quagmire8]

Thanks Val!

Of course, in almost every situation, when there is a baby, the baby should receive human milk. But, Val is right, it really is not an option.

I still have not given them formula. They are now sleeping 3 hours early in the night, then waking every 1-2 hours after. I am in a much better way sleep wise with that 3 hour stretch, but in the long run, it is not enough. They will get formula on Thursday though. I have to go to work for a few hours to get some training completed and I will not have enough breast milk for them for while I am gone. I have finally accepted it and I am not feeling TOO guilty about it. It was bound to happen at some point. We will probably start introducing a bottle of formula/breast milk at night some time next week so I can start to recoup some sleep so I can be in better shape for work. I just hope it doesnt affect my supply so much and begin a downward spiral...but again, it has to be done.

[twinzplus3]

For you, it will be really important to eat as if you have several stomachs. However, most people run into trouble pumping when they pump too quickly after birth and haven't given their milk supply a chance to establish. Once your milk supply is established, it is MUCH easier to keep it all going. It just takes awhile to get it all working together. . .