[destin617]

For 8 years i have been with the woman i married. In the early years she didnt want to have sex out of fear of pregnancy and not being married which i totally respected. but now haveing been married for 2 years in a well of home in a good community with great schools. She still resists having sex with me. I am still a virgin. i was waiting for the wedding night which she made up some excuse for why we couldnt. What now im 30 a virgin and want to know what i should do? Divorce? I have asked and tried everything romatic vacations, sexy lingerie gifts, home cooked meals. but still nothing.
What do i think is there something wrong with me? is there someone else shes getting it from? do i continue to work to save it? or do i move on?

[abrahamalegre]

i really think communication should be done on this matter, as soon as possible. don't be too confrontational though. but make sure to express your concerns - it's only valid; you're already married

[destin617]

I feel like that all we do is talk about it but when the moment come, nothing ever happens and i try to make this just right as with mood lighting and candles music. but nothing does it for her or maybe i just dont do it for her.

[letschildproofdotcom]

you should definitely confront her asap, but don't start a fight. She could have a problem that she is embarrassed to tell you about.

If things don't get better, you may have to consider moving on.

[mcmama]

Is she gay and afraid to tell you? Or just afraid of sex?

[Samual]

A lot of people only have sex to conceive, also most people cannot stand 'mood' lighting or candles.

[shawspear]

. . . I wouldn't have respected it. I don't think she likes you. If I had to guess, she's with you only for your money. If I'm wrong, Ok, I apologize. I'm just telling you what I think and flat out I do not believe a man should be with a woman who won't give it to him (regularly) and I wouldn't wait long for it neither. I say if she's got a real problem with sex, let some other guy deal with it and just move on and find someone else. Really, when you first get married, or more commonly I think, when you first fall in love, you should be having sex every single day!

One more thing and this is just my personal opinion: If you do decide to move on, make it your life's mission to look hot (exercise, healthy life) to attract another women and in general, if she doesn't willingly have sex with you on or before the third date, move on.

[vivalaham]

that's really strange. Sex is just part of a relationship. I guess there's sexless relationships out there, but for the most part, sex is included. It's very important to me. I love intimacy and being that close to my boyfriend. If she didn't tell you before you got married that she was never going to have sex with you, she's totally in the wrong. You can't marry someone and not have sex with them. When you marry someone, you vow to be faithful and only be with that person for the rest of your lives. Not having sex with them is kind of torturous since she's the only person you can have sex with, since she's your wife. It's a shame that she doesn't seem to want to make you happy in that aspect of your life. I don't know what to tell you, man.

[vivalaham]

On or before the third date? I agree with most of your reply.. but you should move on because a girl wont hop into bed on or before the third date??? the third date is still soon for some people. I had sex with my boyfriend on our first date haha... :-\ kind of embarassing. I don't think i would necessarily go back in time and change that, but in the future if me and him end up breaking up, then I wont sleep with him so soon. Sends the wrong message. Us women HAVE to play these stupid games because if you f*ck a guy too soon, he thinks you're a wh*re and wont call you again. Turns out my boyfriend was one of the nice guys, though. sorry I don't know how to quote people, this was directed at the person who responded before me.

[Samual]

Originally Posted by shawspear

. . . I wouldn't have respected it. I don't think she likes you. If I had to guess, she's with you only for your money. If I'm wrong, Ok, I apologize. I'm just telling you what I think and flat out I do not believe a man should be with a woman who won't give it to him (regularly) and I wouldn't wait long for it neither. I say if she's got a real problem with sex, let some other guy deal with it and just move on and find someone else. Really, when you first get married, or more commonly I think, when you first fall in love, you should be having sex every single day!

One more thing and this is just my personal opinion: If you do decide to move on, make it your life's mission to look hot (exercise, healthy life) to attract another women and in general, if she doesn't willingly have sex with you on or before the third date, move on.

Yes, because people who are that easy and have such little regard and respect for themselves are desirable partners!