[For little Elza]

My family has been through a lot in the past three years, one full-term loss of a pregnancy, and two subsequent pregnancies afterwards. My DH is going to school full-time and I have worked up until all three of my due dates working to support the entire family.

The past 10 months have been different with DH. After our child was born, he became much moodier and meaner. He has gone to the doctor and started medication for his angry outbursts. Things have been pretty much up and down... things look like they are improving, then they blow up again out of nowhere.

So now I am 8 months pg. Last Monday he went into a violent outrage and broke a metal kitchen chair to pieces and the trash can too. This happened right in front of our two children, one 11 year old and a 10 month old. And again, I am pregnant. He claims he was frustrated. I was traumatized, as I am sure our 11 year old was too. I thought he would throw the chair into the walls, into the big picture window in the living room, or at me.

I know I am not perfect and that my behavior contributes to the overall dysfunction. My big issue right now is just that I work my behind off every single day, and that he doesn't even bother to get to school on time or make any efforts outside of the house. People have called and offered him work on the side and he won't take the work. He can log work study hours in and he never goes. He leaves everything up to me financially and I am really pregnant and tired. This is the reason I get upset, then try to talk to him, and then face his anger about these situations.

He doesn't seem to understand my physical and mental exhaustion. When he can help financially, he does not even try. If he were doing super good in school, or even going on time, I could understand a little bit more. But I am resenting having to do all the financial stuff. And just yesterday he created an unneccesary $115 charge on my credit card for a car part... that is another story. HELP!