[jgreene]

A friend of mine has a 13-year-old daughter who wants to wear thongs because all of her friends wear them. My friend is not comfortable with this, but she doesn't want to put her child at a disadvantage with her friends. I know thongs are a fashion statement these days, but are they necessary for kids? These girls seem to be too innocent about some fashions they embrace...

[babydawn]

I think it depends on what she wants a thong for. If it is so that you can't see a panty line through her clothes then I don't see a problem with it. I have a pair of capris (Old Navy) and a pair of bermuda shorts (Mossimo) that are fitted, not tight, but fitted, and because of the fabric they are made of, you can see the panty lines really bad. HOWEVER, if she wants them so that she can have the strings hanging out of her pants, which seems to be the style these days, I wouldn't allow it. The reasoning behind her wanting them makes a huge difference on whether or not I would allow it myself.

[jgreene]

That is a very good point! Thongs do have some purposes, after all . I believe that you are right about it being stylish for young women to show their thong straps. I think these girls are just very innocent about the effects of such displays. I did a bit of research on the Internet, and it seems that some boys are also wearing thongs! What will they think of next...

[beth]

I guess every generation has some "thing" that everyone has to wear - at present it's the thong. Maybe you can think of it as a rite of passage like a bra. It's helpful for a young girl to wear a bra even if there's nothing much to put in it. It helps her to feel a part of her peer group, and to be without a bra can be humiliating to the budding ego. I'd let her have a thong. Besides, she might find it so uncomfortable it sits in the bottom of the drawer most of the time!!

[dspiv20]

I went through the same thing with my 13 year old. After months of fighting with her about it and eventually her sneaking wearing them, I finally gave in. After punishing her for wearing them behind my back and having a very long discussion with her I gave her permission. It turned out it was much more important for her to be able to wear them then my reasons were not to let her. She was being made fun of in the locker room at school when she was changing for gym, for wearing "granny panties". She stopped dressing for gym and failed the class because of it. I think as long as they are not wearing it to be sexy it is ok. Other girls can be really cruel at this age.

[Ariane the kid]

Personally, i think thats crazy. Just look at it this way and tell your kid, thongs are like butt floss! lol thats what my mother told me anyways, and besides, no one is usually going to see it! My mother doesnt let me wear thongs, and personally i think they are disgusting. And in closing, its not harsh at all to be against them as a parent.

[ansm89]

As a 16 year old myself, I understand what she's going through. In 8th grade i knew plenty of girls who could and would wear thongs and seemed perfectly carefree about them. I asked my mom about them and of course she said no, but it did aggravate me that so many other mothers would allow it. In 11th grade today, I'm still not allowed to wear them and I have not discussed it with her for over a year. I do wear them without her knowledge because it truly is about fitting in. Panty lines and "granny panties" are very embarrasing to any girl in highschool. Kids make fun of each other and when so many people don't have panty lines, its easy to make fun of the one that does. They really do give me more confidence though. Thinking back on it, I think I was a little too young to want to wear them in 8th grade but at this age I truly wish she would understand.

[babydawn]

They talk about pressure to wear the thong underwear, aren't there just as cute panties out there that are just as instyle that aren't grandma panties....like the boy cut ones, those are dang cute, not quite as sensual as a thong, but trendy enough to be in the panty line of Victoria's Secret. I love those underwear....what about stuff like that? I understand not wanting to wear grandma underwear, but there are a lot of non-grandma underwear out there before you reach the thong.

[mcmama]

My son is at a private school with a very liberal dress code. But lately they have had to be sending home notes reminding parents that there IS a dress code. The boys are wearing ripped pants, the girls are wearing skirts that are more revealing than any mini I ever wore, and the bellys and suggestive t shirts are everywhere.
For some of the girls, there isn't much of a choice out there - everything is cut so low, or tight, and the skirts ride right up their butts. I would definitely say no to a thong for a 13 year old - it sends the wrong message to her about herself! I am sure your friend can find an alternative that doesn't look like it came out of a strip club. But I am sure it is hard for her!

My own 13 year old daughter has been wanting to dress provacativley herself. For Halloween, she showed me a black pleated vynl miniskirt that she wants to get with black fishnet pantyhose. I think since its only for Halloween that I will let her do it.