[Tomgavin]

I am a 21 year old full-time college student living at home while I finish my undergraduate degree. I am a pretty private and independent person. I am responsible and quiet. I pretty much just hang out in my room on a daily basis while I do my work, watch tv, use the computer...etc. I live here with the rest of my family and more specifically my brother. We are the two oldest, he is 24. He doesn't go to school and he doesn't have a job but he does have a family. He also lives here (mostly hangs out in his room also) without having to pay for rent or anything else, he doesn't even help out around the house. He will drive my younger sister to the store once every couple months if that counts. He doesn't take responsibility for anything he does and refuses to grow up. I mean to a drastic extent, will not get a job, will not try and move out with his family, he rarely watches his own child when his child comes over. Him and I really do not speak to each other even though we live ten feet away. However, every so often he will blow up at me and tell me what is wrong with me and why I am the bad person. Like I said we RARELY talk so this comes out of nowhere. I help around the house whenever I am asked to and I help wherever I can.

Here is the problem, I get chastised about everything that is supposidly wrong with me but I don't even talk to the guy. I am barely aknowledged, it just seems I am always being talked about in a negative way from his side and he talks about me to everyone but me. He talks down about everyone, even pulling his temper tantrums (as I call them) with my mother talking to her like no child should talk to their parents and saying things that should NEVER be said. (in my opinion)

and also please tell me if this is wrong, I do not like it when people come into my room and take things without asking. I only request that you ask to borrow something and to return it when you are done. For some reason I am called obsessive and cocky. I just find it rude and disrespectful to march in someones room without their knowledge and take things. Especially when he used to do this very often, take things and not return them. He would even loan his things out to his friends and I would never get those back. He doesn't care though, I ask to get my things back and he doesn't. If I got something back damaged I would consider myself lucky.

I could go on but I am wondering, am I missing something here? Is there something wrong with me that I am not seeing? And how do I deal with this?